In the midst of my Borneo trip, I got a few messages that got me slightly anxious. I often cringed hard to read when I suddenly saw the name of some old acquaintance on various messaging platforms. From the classic ol' Whatsapp to Instagram Direct Message.
Frankly speaking, I'm not a big fan of getting in touch with an old acquaintance. I may come across as rude, but I feel like it's not really necessary to keep in touch, especially when their life is no longer relevant.
Not just that, I've experienced some rather annoying experiences when it comes to trying to be nice with some people from the past.
From The Good Ol' Multi-Level Marketing Trap to Trying to ‘Enlighten' Me
If there's anything I know about growing up, it is to keep my circle small and keep it that way. I mean, everything else is irrelevant.
I've learned the hard way that more often than not, when an old acquaintance suddenly tried to get in touch with you out of sudden, it's already a red flag. I mean, it's not that I've been rude like this all the time, because at first, I swear I tried to be nice and polite a few times.
In result, I've met some apprentice of some multi-level marketing, a salesperson in some insurance company who was more interested in showing me the scheme rather than knowing what's up with each other's lives, and this is the worst… Some people trying to lead me to a ‘better life'.
What I Do Whenever I Get A Sudden Text From Some Ol' ‘Friend'
Well, I'm one of those millennials who would enjoy texting more than receiving a call. I mean, that's exactly the reason why I excel at blogging instead of other platforms like Youtube. I am more comfortable to point out what I think through text rather than to do it verbally.
Given that, it's no brainer to find out the level of excitement whenever I get a text from anyone: the reply.
I'm the kind of person who would go all out if I get excited to talk to you. Like, I'm not going to hesitate to reply a long paragraph just because I have a lot of things to talk about. I don't exactly double text, but then if I enjoy talking with someone, they sure will have a big bubble of chat because that's how much I want to share what's on my head with them.
Otherwise, I won't bother to reply. In fact, I've got some people that I had to mute on some messaging platforms I use because I feel like even if I try to get in touch with them, their personality or their way of thinking nowadays would be toxic for my mental health.
1. Ignore Them All At Once.
Guilty as charged, I've got some people that I had to put on my ‘ignore list' on Messenger because that's how much I don't want to get in touch with them.
Well, I don't want to block them at this point, but then I don't want to socialize with them either. Could you even relate with that kind of situation?!
I mean, seriously… Some of them only messaged me on Messenger to ask my Whatsapp number. Like, through Messenger itself, they could reach out to me. They could even call me there if they might, why would they still need my Whatsapp number?
2. Reply Their Text to See How It Goes.
I mean, not all old acquaintances who reach out to me are pain in the ass like those people trying to ‘enlighten' me. Some genuinely text me because they need some help in which I could easily assist them with anything that I've got.
I don't really expose this blog to my ‘real' friends, but then I figure some people have found out about this blog anyway. Which I wouldn't really bother, not unless they try to ‘preach' me whatever.
So, when some old acquaintances reached out to me to ask about how to start a blog, or just some recommendation to stay in Singapore, then I'm more than happy to help with my knowledge.
I always trust my guts whenever I decide to reply a text from someone. Some of them have turned into a good conversation even.
If not, then you could always come back to stage one. 😛
3. Have A Proper Discussion Like You're Adults Now.
Or not. Whatever.
I once had to call out my old friend from trying to take me to a ‘better' life. I literally had to give her a lesson about how better for someone could be worse for the others. At that point, I even had to ask her to stay away from me for our own good.
I mean, I just don't understand why some people think that I have to stay the same as when I was in high school. I'm growing as a freaking person. Not just by my body weight, but also by what's in my head.
It's been almost 15 years ever since I graduated high school, with most of my friends already have to take their kids to school as parents. Why would they expect me to be the same girl I was a decade ago?!
4. Be Dramatic. All At Once.
Well, the last time is one that pissed me off.
So, when I was in Borneo, a friend actually asked what I actually do with the slight sense of suspicious to the point that I got a bit offended.
I've figured, for some people that I know in life, digital nomad life is not exactly a thing. So when they see me stroll around Borneo for a month, they may think that I'm the sugar baby of some random daddy. Huh, if only it was true!!!
I got to the point I was so offended that I had to create a clarification on my personal Instagram stories about what I do. I left this person's message on read, obviously. But I replied it through stories so everyone could see. Just in case there are some other dickheads out there.
Keep Your Circle Small.
Seriously guys, there are reasons why you should never linger on your past. Some people from the past could be toxic for your present life.
For it, keep your circle small and stay energized with those people whose vibes suit yours. Stay awesome, cheerio! 😀